She says: We will Survive

Since last week, we have been hit with several bad news. From shortage of invitations, my nervous breakdown, disappointment towards lack of excitement from close friends, lighting difficulties. The additional bad news came this morning. Our officiating pastor for the holy matrimony and solemnization can’t make it for the event. He has to attend to another urgent matter on that day. We are quite disappointed to hear that. One bad news after another, dampened our spirit.

Our wedding preparation reflects the marriage itself. We started off happy and super excited, planning and dreaming. But throughout the process we face discouragement, disappointment, problems. Marriage is not a bed of roses. Even roses have thorns. But we need to decide whether we want to continue pressing on when times get hard. Will we cling on to each other even more when problems come.

A lot of ideas of how nice this wedding can be, we put a lot of effort and thoughts to it. But when people around us is not supportive, we get discouraged. But when I think again, that shouldn’t be the case. While we have no control on others’ attitude, we can control our own response to it. Winston was more disappointed than me since he has been a leader for sometimes, he has even bigger expectation. So disappointment comes when expectation is not met. What we can do is manage the expectation and rethink of what our wedding should be. It should be our celebration of love in marriage, the party is secondary. I am sure our friends are happy for that.

I am glad that all these problems come before the actual day. Bumpy road prepares us and this too, shall pass..We are not just showing the good part only, but also the down part. We are not asking for sympathy nor trying to offend anyone. This is our blog, we bare because we care. Haha, sounds like a ads jingle..

Anyway we will survive our wedding and comes out stronger as a person and as a couple.. till then, stay happy!

We say: GARAGE SALE!!

Hellen is having a garage sale with her housemates in her yard / carpark. This is the second time we are holding such an event. The last event was a huge success where many of our neighbors benefited from it. $10 for a brand new portable cooker is such a bargain!

So this time, Hellen is going to move out from her place, so she will say goodbye to her nice country cabinet, design books, nice dresses, etc (Winston edit: No la! They can be transported to our new house la!).

So if you have yet to plan anything on Sat or Sun, come and visit us here at Tanjong Katong. You can take Paya Lebar MRT or the new Dakota MRT, and walk over!

See ya!

She says: The Inevitable Stress

I just went for a site visit with Lily, my friend who is also my classmate in the wedding planner course. She is a part-time wedding planner. She gave a few good suggestions about the program and the space. I just realized that as a bride-to-be, while planning is fun, the coordination on the actual day is a nightmare. You can plan very well, but who can execute that for you?? You really need somebody that understand the whole plan like you do, be your double.

Suddenly fear grips my heart. Maybe all the things that I do is not enough. What if the wedding is not as wonderful as I thought it would be. All the negative thinking starts pouring down on me. I can feel the tension running to my head and for the first time, I feel stressed out.

It’s inevitable to be stressed out regardless of the effort you have put in the planning. No matter how well you have planned, if no one can coordinate well enough, it is going to be a sweet flop. I can imagine the stress level for the couple, who doesn’t hire a professional wedding organizer, yet expect a perfectly coordinate wedding. Many of the Singaporeans rely on their friends to coordinate their wedding. Winston had played the role of wedding coordinator for a few times, and he is good at it plus.. he loves to do it. Sometimes when we have helped coordinated so many weddings and it’s time for our turn to get married, we get disappointed when we didn’t get the response we expect.

That’s why I just had an epiphany, wedding organizer or wedding planner is the answer for the inevitable stress the couple will face. When the bride is also the wedding planner, she can only rely on herself and (perhaps) the groom. No room for breakdown or cold feet. If you can’t afford wedding planner, at least go for a professional wedding organizer.

I still think it’s good to show the down moment of our wedding planning. This is to answer my own question of ” Do I need a Wedding Planner?”  (see the post here).

I might need it now.

She says: Confession of a Paperholic

Yesterday was Earth Day (22 April). I wouldn’t brag about being a green person looking at the amount of earth-damage I contributed in my wedding alone. The most-used element in my wedding is paper. I have to confess. I love paper, a  lot. I love stationery since I was young. The main element of my outdoor decoration is paper. I bought almost all aqua paper from Popular to do the paper rosettes and envelope liners.

and the tiffany boxes..

Well at least our letterpress invitation is made of 100% cotton paper (that is why.. they cost a bomb!)

We still have a menu for each person and displays for guest signing.

At least we try to redeem ourselves by designing them neatly so the guests won’t throw it away right after the party (or I hope so).

For the eco-bride, here are some tips from our friend at National Parks Singapore :

• Hold your wedding in a park or garden
• Use single layer invitation cards printed on recycled paper, treeless paper made from bamboo or other materials, or better yet, use e-invitations to reduce paper wastage
• If using disposable tableware, choose biodegradable products
• Encourage your guests to car-pool or van-pool
• Choose a caterer that is familiar with the venue to avoid any damage to the site during their setup or teardown
• Select wedding favors that are useful for your guests to minimise throwaways
• Consider using pre-owned items (e.g. wedding gown, decorations) for your wedding
• Decorate your wedding venue with potted plants that you can use again to decorate your home instead of fresh cut flowers where possible
• Source for local flowers and plants to decorate the wedding venue to minimise resources used in transporting them
• Setup a gift registry to minimise unwanted gifts
• Let your guests know to avoid giving congratulatory cards but instead sign their best wishes on your wedding guestbook.
• Request for guests to donate towards an environmental cause
• Request for cleaners at the venue to separate recyclable items from those that are not and dispose them accordingly
• Avoid shark’s fin in your menu
• Avoid the use of confetti

She says: 2 Months to Go – Additional Elements

2 more months to our wedding! So excited yet nervous. After all that we have prepared, suddenly it doesn’t feel enough. Seems like we have created an inevitable bar of expectation for our guests and our readers. We have seemed to do a lot, but actually the things we do are detail-oriented and on a small scale. Our inspiration board speaks louder than the actual execution.

I became very nervous when I envisioned my outdoor wedding with whatever we have right now. We have imposed on us a huge challenge. The venue is a blank canvas.

We can’t hang anything (one broken branch will cost us  SGD 500 according to National Parks Council). We also don’t have big budget for decor, so the flower is kept in rustic feel and in cluster-small size. Tents can be quite cold without any decoration. We did paper rosettes but they are small. The impact is in a different zone. I need something big and visible.

So I decided to go on something along our theme of white-tiffany-fun-handmade.

Balloon. Big Balloon. Think Martha Stewart in Summer edition. Think Amy Atlas and her white dessert table.

via The Girl

So I looked for this kind of non glossy-big-36″ balloon in Singapore. The first attempt is not very successful. The sales person suggested to use the normal balloon which is very cost-effective ($1.50/pc). When I explained to her the balloon I want, she said:

“Haaa.. very big ahh.. are you suree? Smaller better lah! Very big, you knoww! For wedding right? No lahh.. too big, girl..”

Err… and finally she quoted me.  SGD 50/ pcs.

How can that be possible!

I am determined to find my way to get these balloons. It’s the perfect solution to my non-hang situation.

Wish me luck!

She says: Do-It-Myself Camera Box

During my last trial mock-up cum food tasting, it dawn on me that my wedding banquet is actually pretty low-key compare to my outdoor wedding. I put so much attention on the decor and stuff in my outdoor that I neglected my banquet. Honestly we don’t have anymore budget for decor in Conrad. I was a bit downcast when the centerpiece looks plain. My sister was asking where did my hard work go to?

So I decided to do something for the camera base. I headed to Daiso and found an idea immediately, thanks to my sister, Irene, who suggested a nest box.

So here’s it!

I bought the boxes, the paper cushion and the paint from Daiso. The pearl comes from Mangga Dua, Jakarta.

She says: Sneak Peek – Our Letterpress Invitation

Some of you might know my side wedding stationery business, Pemberley, with my best friends. Here‘s some background of it.

We are launching our very own letterpress collection this year after our wedding.  We are seriously in love with the crispness and the deep impression it leaves in my heart (pun-intended). We will kick this off with my invitation and Katryn’s suite (the other Pemberley lady).  Hers is much more elegant and classy, reflects perfectly on her taste and style.

I am so thrilled when I lay my hands on it. Its a dream come true !!

Here’s the sneak peek..

[Winston's edit: I am generally busier nowadays and has not been blogging often as before. Thanks to Hellen who keeps this going! 64 days to our wedding!]

She says: Great pictures from Ian Photography

If you missed our introduction of Ian Photography, you can trace back his journey from the start until his current work. He is also going to be part of my family, since he has proposed to my beautiful sister, Irene (see their first location-scout pictures here). Part of the tradition, he also took pre-wed pictures for my elder brother! My brother is getting married this October. He met his fiance while acting as Best Man and her as a Maid of Honor. Classic! That fateful event was one of my childood friend’s wedding. We like to keep things in the family.

So check out Ian’s latest addition of Lie’s family. Here’s the prelude written in Ian’s blog:

What’s your daily habit? I’m sure we have different answers for that question. Willy and Fetrisia have a similar daily habit. It’s to eat healthily and take daily vitamins. Learning that from our brainstorm session, we came up with this idea: ‘Dosage of Love’.

Many people are asking about what do we have to give in a relationship. Every couple needs a little this and that to make the relationship works, and of course the amount of things are different for every couple. So this is our interpretation of the dosage of love for Willy and Fetrisia, which are:

• one handful of companion
• a spoonful of praise
• ten litres of service
• a thousand grams of tolerance
• pack and packs of hugs
• a hundred ounces of kisses
• and a cup of each other.. till death do us part.

Enjoy!

She says: A Glimpse of Wedding in Jakarta

Last February I went back to Jakarta for my cousin’s wedding. He’s 25 and his fiancee is 24. Both of them are Indonesian-Chinese, young, comes from a good proper middle-class family and are sometimes reckless. They had an eventful pre-wedding drama, but in the end they decided to still get married, 3 days before the actual wedding.

Setting aside the drama, their wedding pictures shows a rather normal wedding in Jakarta. Hold your breath. Normal means 700 invites equals to 1500 guests. Yup we are talking about a feast here. It is pretty common to spend around 60k-100k or more over a wedding. But we are talking about the middle-to-upper class here. It is also common to hire wedding organizer to coordinate the wedding.

The stage is the center of attraction, so for most of the people the bigger the better. I recently noticed that this practice resembles Malay wedding here in Singapore, so maybe it is adapted from the Javanese practice. Last time, the couple will just stand in the stage waiting for people to shake their hands, now they interact with the guests during the reception. The whole process is rather formal and the major player of the wedding is the food. So if the food is good, the wedding is good. Who cares about good decor and programs? At least we find a common ground with Singapore wedding.

It is also proper to dress up for a wedding, including go to hair salon to get your hair done. For the close family, this includes buying new dress and full make up.

Every country has different wedding practices and while I am having a Singaporean type of wedding, I try to incorporate my hometown’s flavor into the wedding. By putting extra effort in design and decor.

So I hope my banquet guests in Singapore will also put an effort to dress up. Casual is a big no-no..

Here are the pictures:

She says: Busy Week Surprise – Pink London Cab

We were going off from Kriston food tasting, when we flagged a special cab. A pink London Cab, the only one in Singapore and the world (the driver claimed)! It is a real surprise, because we have never seen one, let alone sit on it. So we didn’t  waste this opportunity to chat with the proud driver and take pictures inside. It provides privacy and space, perfect for a wedding car. The driver and passenger communicate through speakers and if we don’t want to be heard, we just off the speaker. So cool!

Apparently this pink cab is also a hot item for weddings and events. We were thinking of potentially using this pink cab for our wedding. However, pink is out of our color scheme, so.. yeah.. cute as it is but only good for photo taking at the moment.

Winston wore a matching pink shirt! Awesome!